For those whose level of maturity qualifies them to relate

1968: Long hair

2018: Longing for hair

1968: KEG

2018: EKG

1968: Acid rock

2018: Acid reflux

1968: Moving to California because it’s cool

2018: Moving to Arizona because it’s warm

1968: Trying to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

2018: Trying NOT to look like Marlon Brando or Liz Taylor

1968: Seeds and stems

2018: Roughage

1968: Hoping for a BMW

2018: Hoping for a BM

1968: Going to a new, hip joint

2018: Receiving a new hip joint

1968: Rolling Stones

2018: Kidney Stones

1968: Screw the system

2018: Upgrade the system

1968: Disco

2018: Costco

1968: Parents begging you to get your hair cut

2018: Children begging you to get their heads shaved

1968: Passing the drivers’ test

2018: Passing the vision test

1968: Whatever

2018: Depends

Just in case we weren’t feeling too old today, this will certainly
change things. Each year the staff at Beloit College in Wisconsin puts
together a list to try to give the faculty a sense of the mindset of
this year’s incoming freshmen. Here’s this year’s list:

The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were
born in 2000.

They are too young to remember the space shuttle blowing up.

Their lifetime has always included AIDS

Bottle caps have always been screw off and plastic.

The CD was introduced 9 years before they were born.

They have always had an answering machine..

They have always had cable.

They cannot fathom not having a remote control..

Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.

They never took a swim and thought about Jaws.

They can’t imagine what hard contact lenses are.

They don’t know who Mork was or where he was from.

They never heard: “Where’s the Beef?”, “I’d walk a mile for a Camel”,
or “de plane, Boss, de plane..”

They do not care who shot J. R. and have no idea who J. R. even is.

Mc Donald’s never came in Styrofoam containers.

So have a nice day! It is good to have friends like you, who know about
these things and are still alive and kicking!


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