The Wire; Your week in review

The WIRE: Your week in review

The WIRE: Your week in review


Robert DeNiro

From the IG’s bogus report to DeNiro’s stupid retort — and most points in between — it’s time for a look back at the week that was. Personal Liberty Digest® presents: The WIRE!

The Department of Justice Inspector General’s report into the FBI’s conduct under former Director James Comey hit the newsstands Thursday, and it revealed there was collusion to interfere with the 2016 election results, but not between President Donald Trump and the Russians.

The DoJ sprung major leaks. Fortunately, there were plenty of buckets.

It included charges that Comey was insubordinate, but that he wasn’t motivated by partisanship. That actually makes sense. He screwed everyone.

Yay! Everyone hates me!

Comey did do ONE guy a favor. The IGs report revealed that Comey deliberately tried to hide the identity of one individual with whom Hillary Clinton repeatedly communicated through her “bathroom” server, even from “the territory of a foreign adversary.”

“Scandal-free,” huh?

Comey even admitted that he didn’t know disgraced ex-Congressman, and Clinton crony, Anthony Weiner was married to Hillary’s consigliere Huma Abedin.

Neither did Sidney Leathers. And I’m not too sure Weiner was aware, either.

The report also transcribed a text exchange between anti-Trump FBI Agent Peter Strzok and his paramour, DoJ lawyer Lisa Page, in which Page begged Strzok to assure her that Trump was “not ever going to become president, right? Right?!” Strzok responded ominously “No. No he won’t. We’ll stop it.” But there was no evidence of political bias at work! They had top men on it!

Top. Men.

The explosive report has spurred the House Judiciary Committee to threaten to subpoena Strzok to get some straight answers about his behavior. Strzok should do himself a favor, and stay the hell out of Fort Marcy Park for the foreseeable future.

Ask Vince Fost… oooh… awkward.

Hillary bagman John Podesta thinks the report proves there is “good evidence” that Comey cost Clinton the election.

There’s even better evidence that Podesta making his password “password” probably helped.

Democrats caught a case of the sads over the summit between U.S. President Donald Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un, blasting Trump for “legitimizing a brutal dictator.”

Remind me Raul, are you the one I secretly airlifted pallets of cash to?

While the Democrats insisted the summit between President Donald Trump and North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un was a photo-op at best and legitimization of a dictator at worst, South Korean President Moon Jae-in had a different perspective, calling the meeting “an historic occasion.”

Yeah, what does he know? He only LIVES there.

Kim’s minions were clearly dumbfounded by Singapore’s luxuriously appointed Capella Resort, at which the summit was staged.

“Stop staring and help me out this chair, or you all die when we get back to Pyongyang!”

It’s official! Norwegian lawmakers this week nominated Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize after the summit with Kim Jong Un.

Meanwhile, in Chappaqua: “Hillary! Put down the knife!”

I’ll sit here with my arms crossed. Angela, you act annoyed. The rest of you guys stand around looking concerned. Then we can all go bomb the crap out of some third-world country.

Business as usual.

Amnesty advocates continue to blame Trump for the treatment of illegal alien kids at the border. One liberal pundit even interrupted a White House press briefing to shriek at Press Secretary Sarah Sanders about her supposed lack of “empathy.”

How empathetic are the parents who drag their kids along when they try to commit a crime? But sure, blame Trump.

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi wants to know “why there aren’t uprisings all over the country” in response to conditions at the U.S. border with Mexico. I dunno, Gam-Gam. Maybe because a roaring economy and pictures of illegal aliens being mistreated by former Presidents isn’t really something to get your Depends® in a wad over.

Also: Because treason is a thing.

More fun times in the leftist paradise of Venezuela, where the dreaded disease Polio is staging a comeback, decades after it was seemingly eradicated from the country.

Socialism and universal healthcare were both unavailable for comment.

London Mayor Sadiq Khan isn’t gonna stand for injustice any longer! According to hizzoner “The vast majority of Wikipedia editors are men — and just 17 percent of its biographies are of women. We’re calling on Londoners to help us redress this gender imbalance and ensure women’s stories are fully represented online!”

Having solved the epidemic of truck attacks, stabbings and islamofascism, Khan moved on to a more pressing issue: Too many dudes editing a website.

A proposal to split California into three separate states has earned a spot on the November statewide ballot.

The three new states would be called “Pelosistan, Hollyweird, and Tolerable.”

Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif.) said on CNN that Democrats plan to investigate Ivanka Trump if they win the midterm elections. In the event anyone still didn’t know Schiff is a grade-A creepazoid.

You know he’ll try to get the FBI to plant a camera in her bathroom.

CNN blowhole Wolf Blitzer tried to defend his industry this week, protesting “We are not the enemy of the American people. We love the American people.” You love them so much, you run them down like roadkill if they make gifs you don’t like.

Must be tough love.

The surprise defeats in primaries of establishment Republicans like South Carolina Rep. Mark Sanford did a pretty good job of demonstrating the “Trump effect” on the GOP. Starting to think it might not be that good an idea to bet against this guy.

Upside: Now you’ll have plenty of time to “hike the Appalachian Trail.”

Disgraced ex-President Bill Clinton leapt to the defense of disgraced ex-Minnesota Senator Al Franken this week, whining “I think the norms have really changed in terms of, what you can do to somebody against their will…”

I miss the good old days, when “no” meant “go for it!”

And, millionaire Actor Robert DeNiro took advantage of his spotlight at the Tony Awards to tell America “F*ck Trump.” This would be the Democrats’ plan to enlist Hollywood to help them get out the vote.

With a message like that, it should work as well as it did for Hillary.

And that’s your week in review! For the Personal Liberty Digest®, I’m Ben Crystal saying “See you next week, on The WIRE!”

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